Back from California

I spent about 8 days in Dana Point and Los Angeles for an extended Thanksgiving trip. It was fun getting to be a sort of tourist in my own city as it were. However, I never want to go back there for that long again! As much as it is nice by the beach and getting around to certain shops and museums, I was glad I didn’t live there anymore. As I drove around all I could think was, “I never want to die here”. As ugly as Cleveland can be at times, L.A. and Orange County can be just as ugly, but in a different way. I had so much friggin’ fun with my friends who I haven’t seen in ages, but that can never mask the uneasiness and stress I feel anytime I set foot anywhere in SoCal. I always feel manic energy spewing from the basin, and my pulse rate goes down once I get to the desert or further north. Anyhow, it was a long trip for me, and even though I skipped going to some old haunts, here’s what I remember:

– Giving a neck massage to a large goat at a petting zoo. Because all animals deserve a break I think.
– A small boy falling into a swimming pool, me fishing him out in a panic, only to have him say, “that was awesome!”
– Getting lost downtown with my friend trying to find a party, “I feel like it is 1990 and I’m trying to find a rave”
– A mod dance party on the set where they film CSI Miami laboratory scenes.
– My friend getting bitched out for daring to play Led Zeppelin at the dance party.
– Lots of Tecate
– Spray painted pictures of Che everywhere, which turn out to be pictures of Stallone for the new Rambo movie.
– A $100 gallon of KY Jelly at the Westwood CVS, with full hand-pump included.
– Loads of art shows in Culver City, Laguna Beach and Beverly Hills
– A rather famous artist sending dirty — therefore hilarious — emails to my friend.
– Shuffleboard
– Dancing in a parking lot
– Getting lost in Beverly Hills, “I’m in front of Michael Kors, what street is that, where am I?”
– A stripper pole in someone’s dining room.
– Riding around in the back of a Rolls Royce for an afternoon to various museums.
– The Murakami exhibit, which was so out of control and such overload that I couldn’t even sleep that night.
– Watching the rough edit of Snoop Dogg’s new reality show to give a critique on it.
– The “Salvation” sign at the Silverlake Lounge, it had been so long since last I saw it.
– Drinking more Starbucks than ever in my life.
– Getting stuck on the 405 for two and a half hours (it wouldn’t be a trip to L.A. without that)

I forgot my camera on this trip, but it isn’t like people don’t see pictures of SoCal cities and art shows all the time anyways. But yes, that was what I’ve been up to.

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